Saturday, July 12, 2014

Going, going, home.

It seems like just yesterday I left Montreal and moved my life to Japan. I left Montreal with a bit of a sour taste and I think that's a big part of the reason I didn't go back for so long, along with financial/job reasons as well. After living in Korea for a year and missing Montreal like crazy, I returned to a place that left me so disappointed, bored and that made me feel like a stranger. The life I had missed and imagined for a full year turned out to be a bit of an illusion, and the reality was harsh and I couldn't wait to get out again.

For the past four years, I grew to appreciate Montreal and the quality of life I had there, something I don't have as much in Japan. I'm now eager to go back, and even though I'm not sure where I stand with my feelings about that place, what I know for sure is that I have a family and longtime friends waiting for me there. It's home.

I remember my last day in Montreal, roaming around my neighbourhood in pajamas, having brunch at La Croissanterie with my mom and some close friends, then a late-night club sandwich in the Mile End, and a short nap before the taxi took me across the city at 3am, to the airport. I somehow knew I wouldn't come back so soon, but now looking back, I feel sad and regretful I haven't visited before now.

A small part of me is nervous to see the place I left so hastily and the memories. I have no idea how I'll feel at all. If I think about it too much I get really anxious and need to watch Friends or something to forget about it. But mostly I feel so amazing about taking this trip, as I think I'll finally be able to relax and feel comfortable at home and somehow just melt back into it. I'm curious to see, will I start missing Japan a lot, or will I be dreading my return? I guess I'll have a few more answers soon.

In other news, I went to the Mario Bros.-themed bar tonight with the girls, and it was great. The place is filled with paraphernalia from the game, including plush toys, themed cocktails, an actual game console and a pretty sweet rooftop patio defying safety laws. I highly recommend visiting it, as it's one of those 'only in Japan' places. They even played the Friends theme song, and that made my life complete.


Tanya Geddes said...

Vivian! I'm so happy you are going home. It's nice to have a chance to see what your feelings are about home. It will clarify a lot of questions.

I can relate to having mixed feelings. Even now I'm back in London, a part of me remains in Japan. I think places and people we connect with, we always carry around with us. Instead of being sad, I choose to be happy at all the opportunities I had and have ^_^. I'm trying to be more 'present' and grateful to where I am now, without forgetting my past.

The Mario bar looks super cute. It's these small things which keep me glued to your blog. I vicariously live my pretend Japanese life through your experiences.

All my best wishes,

Tanya XO

Christine said...

Have a safe trip and I hope you find the answers you are looking for.

Even if you don''s always good to see family and friends. Enjoy each day :)

JoellaJ said...

Have an amazing time Vivian! Enjoy seeing your family and friends :-)