Sunday, April 12, 2009

Korea, and everything after

Life post-Korea is harsh. I've been talking to some of my friends who also went home around the same time I did, and it's been a struggle for all of them. Especially when it comes to finding a job, and just getting settled back, and re-adjusting to life and friends who have changed.

I've been looking online for fellow blogs of expats who went through the same experience I did, and it's been comforting to read that I'm not alone in that situation. Frankly, I've been back for two months, and those two months have been the most difficult and challenging of my life. No kidding. I don't even remember much in the few days following my landing in Canada, everything was such a blur. I was so heartbroken to leave Seoul and friendships behind, and not ready at all to face reality. I did not openly write about the daily struggle on my blog (true to my personal style, I was the same in Seoul when I had bad moments, always trying to show a strong face)- but too many days I just didn't feel like waking up and face the day.

And reality hit hard. Re-evaluating my relationship, my friendships, my career, my future, and what I want out of life. I thought the real challenge was actually living in Korea, but no. Life after Korea is THE biggest challenge to face, as teaching in Korea is a fun ride scattered with cultural confusion (and yes, many times frustration). It doesn't seem like real life most of the time, but it affects everything that comes after.

I'm happy to say things are slowly getting better. I feel a lot more like myself, especially since I found a job I love, in my field. I feel good again, I'm working hard on many things, I want to go out, see friends, and be the Vivian I was in Seoul. I'm moving on, and ready for new and exciting things that are upcoming in my life. I still have no idea what's happening next month, next summer, or next fall, but I have a feeling it might be pretty amazing.

7 comments:

Kelly said...

i love this attitude you're sporting! it's so encouraging :) I'm glad you're hitting such a happy place in your life. Can't wait for you to start your job!

Nicole Marie said...

I'm sorry things are so hard for you Vivian. I know things will get easier and I hope you're able to get happy and figure out whatever it is that needs figuring out to make you happy!!

thevoyageofv said...

Moving around is exciting and a wonderful thing to do. But it's also very hard. I struggle with it a lot, especially now that I will be heading back to Sweden in a mere month and a half. And then after that, the plan is to come back to the U.S. for good in December. All that moving around makes it hard to lay down roots. And it puts strain on relationships. I wouldn't change my past decisions to do all these things, but I also don't think I can keep going like this for too much longer. I'm old, it's time to settle down soon :-)
But it seems like you're on the right track to balancing your life out, and I love reading about your experiences! Everything will fall into place as it should.

Cupcakes and Cashmere said...

isn't it nice when you finally hit your stride again? i've found that so many of my friends had a tough time transitioning to their old life after returning from living abroad. glad that you're getting through it with your head held high! xo

pranksygang said...

vivan to tell the truth u inspired me a lot.. !! you are very strong! keep it up..

{lovely little things} said...

Glad it's starting to look up, that sounds like a challenging transition, hope it keeps getting better

Melvin said...

Awesome pics...
thanks for sharing....

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Melvin
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